As this year goes on I am growing weary. Weary of fighting the fight. Weary of trying one med after another. Weary of constant doctor and therapist visits that seem to get me nowhere. Juat when it seems things are looking up, that quickly come crashing down.
I’m not sure what I’m going to do, or if I’m going to do anything soon but I need off this ride one way or another. I cant keep pretending to be strong for everyone else when all I want to do is be done.
Physical and emotional traumas are horrible to deal with for years and years. I wish it was something you could just walk away from and say fuck you too. Folks will tell you to get over it or forget about it. It’s just not that easy. I wish it was. The depression makes me nauseous and have cold sweats. I cam take Xanax and it will help by putting me to sleep but that’s a bandaid, not a cure. I need the cure of just being gone. Gone from pain, whether emotional or physical. Gone from Earth. 🌎
Bipolar1964 